Your Personal Theory of Life and Why You May Need to Realise It

Everyone has a personal theory about life. Although many don’t know what it is. They’re not aware of their personal theory and how it sabotages them. Or how it creates success. Many clients come to me anxious, overwhelmed and miserable. Life feels beyond their control. But it isn’t. Feeling out of control is an indication that we need to take more control.

Make the most of your life. Live it like it’s the only one you will ever have.

You can take control again by articulating a comprehensive personal theory about life: who you are, your purpose and potential. Your personal theory of life influences the circumstances in your life and how well you manage it. It influences your thoughts, words, feelings and actions. Realising your personal theory of life can help you to answer the big questions.

• Who am I?
• Why was I born?
• What is the meaning of life?
• Is there more meaning to life than this?
• What am I meant to do with my life?
• What is my purpose?
• Do I have a purpose?
• What is my potential?
• Do I have potential?
• How do I realise my potential?

When you realise your personal theory of life, you put yourself back in the driver’s seat. In charge. As the author of your life. When you can articulate a comprehensive personal theory about life you will not only be back and in control, but you will be able to identify your purpose and who you are. So you can clarify your highest potential.

By articulating a comprehensive personal theory about life you will gain access to an unlimited source of wisdom that you can call on for the rest of your life.

So that you can:

• realise who you are
• realise why you were born
• realise the meaning of life
• realise what you can do with your life
• realise your purpose
• realise your potential
• design your life to reflect your truth

I like to think that I don’t tell others what to do and most of the time that’s true. But not if I feel it can be of some help. So here it is. This is what you need to do:

You need to realise your personal theory about life and how it affects your success and failure. You need to find out who you are. You need to identify your purpose so that you can make the most of your life. Live it like it’s the only one you have.

A Personal or Spiritual Crisis?

There is a difference between an identity crisis and a spiritual crisis. An identity crisis involves your personality. It manifests as confusion about the roles that you play in life, concern about approval from others and your image,  issues of self esteem and self sabotage.

A spiritual crisis breaks into your soul.

Everything in your physical, emotional and mental worlds lose their appeal for you.

When you begin to reject the physical, emotional and mental gifts from spirit in favour of a pure and contemplative connection with the Divine then you know you are on the brink of the dark night of the soul. Here’s what you can expect.

How do I develop self-awareness so that I follow my inner guidance?

Archetypes are tools that can be used to develop self-awareness. Archetypes are universal patterns of behaviour that manifest as roles that we play.  According to Caroline Myss (2001) we all share four roles. They are the Child, Victim, Prostitute and Saboteur. These roles can influence our mindset. Our mindset can influence the roles we play. We slip in and out of a them without thinking, without self-awareness.

Archetypes can indicate your challenges and solutions. Image by Benno Poeder

Therefore, every role we play, the thoughts we have, the emotions we experience, the words that we speak and the actions that we take may be productive or unproductive. How well we play our roles may depend on the awareness of our own mindset and the impact that a productive or unproductive mindset can have on the world around us.

Child

Challenge: Responsible vs Irresponsible

A productive Child mindset knows when to be serious and when to lighten up. To do this we can:

• Enjoy ourselves rather than being serious all the time
• Be resilient rather than rigid
• Be strong enough to learn from experience rather than avoiding the issue
• Be dependable rather than unreliable

Victim

Challenge: Protect vs Endanger

A productive Victim mindset knows when to be pro-active and when to be vulnerable. To do this we can:

• Set and maintain our personal boundaries rather than being used.
• Stand-up for ourselves rather than let ourselves down.
• Move on rather than dwell too long in self-pity
• Safeguard rather than jeopardise ourselves or others

Prostitute

Challenge: Ethical vs Unethical

A productive Prostitute mindset knows when to compromise and when to stand firm. To do this we can:

• Be loyal to our values rather than compromising our integrity
• Negotiate a win/win deal for all rather than selling out ourselves or others
• Be true to ourselves and others rather than losing trust
• Maintain our personal honour rather than lose our dignity

Saboteur

Challenge: Constructive vs Destructive

A productive Saboteur mindset knows when to listen to the critics (or the inner critic) and when to listen to inner guidance. To do this we can:

• Be objective rather than biased
• Supervise our thoughts, words and actions rather than overlook them
• Be guided by our conscience rather than shutting it down
• Be productive rather than unproductive or counterproductive.

How do we know if the voice in our head is the inner critic or the inner guide? We need to ask: Is what I am about to say or do responsible or irresponsible? Will it protect or endanger myself or others? Is it ethical or unethical? Is it constructive or destructive? By asking these four simple questions we can develop and improve our self-awareness.

 

Reference

Myss, C 2001, Sacred contracts: Awakening your divine potential, Harmony Books, New York.

It’s Your Call to Respond to Your Calling

There are preliminary steps you need to take before you can follow your calling. This is why many people don’t respond to it. Not because they are afraid of their calling but because they don’t know where to start. They’re overwhelmed by it. Or they don’t have a yearning for it because they don’t have the energy for it.

It’s up to you to prepare yourself to respond to your call

But here’s the thing. No one is getting any younger. No one. Not one person on earth. The truth is, time is short. Your time to respond to your calling is running out. Most of the time you waste time thinking and doing things that are irrelevant or even detrimental to your mental and emotional health.

You avoid taking responsibility or you take on too much. You play the victim or you prey on others. You sell your soul to the highest bidder. You sell out others. They sell you out. You sabotage yourself. You sabotage others. They sabotage you. You damage your soul and deplete your spirit. This is bad for your body. Stress and tension create anxiety and that can lead to depression. It’s a difficult cycle to break.

How can you respond to your calling when you hardly have the energy to drag yourself to work? Or worse, you don’t have the energy to get up in the morning.

You have to prepare yourself so that your mind and emotions are ready to embrace your calling. You have to be ready to prepare yourself. You have to be in a state that is ready to respond.

So how do you prepare for your calling?

One of the first things to do is to clear the air in your relationships. Now is the time to act. Clearing the air in your relationships doesn’t mean that these people will be out of your life. Not unless you want it that way. It’s your call. Clear the air so that you can be free to be who you need to be. Free to respond to your calling.

You need coaxing to dive into your potential. Okay, here’s some not-so-tough love.

If you’re afraid to dive into your potential right now, developing a taste for it might help you to feel more at ease about it. All you need to do is wake up prepared to be amazed every day. Sounds easy but if you’re not prepared to be amazed every day, then you’ll need to ask why and what you need to do to be ready.

Genius at work. Be prepared to be amazed.

One way to develop a sense of readiness is to look for the potential in others. Another way is to look for the potential in your current circumstances. Yet another is to look for the potential in upcoming events. One more way is to look for the potential in objects that you own or could own.

Actually, if you look for the potential in everything and everyone around you, then you can hardly miss it. And when you’ve developed the habit of looking for the potential in everything and everyone around you, then you might find yourself diving into your potential without a second thought. It will feel like second nature to you. This is where you want to be. In a place where recognising the potential in all people, places, events and things comes easy to you.

To answer the “why” of not being prepared? The big scary thing about your own potential is that you can’t see it until you dive in. First. It’s easier to see the potential in other people, places, events and things, but your own potential is not usually visible until after you dive in. Then you can reach it. You will have to take a leap of faith into yourself. So start by looking for the potential in others, then move on to looking for the potential in events, then places and then objects. Be on the lookout. Prepare to be amazed.

Dive Into Your Potential. One More Lecture in Tough Love

It is your duty to be the best you can be. And I’m not talking about your body. I’m referring to your spirit. The atmosphere that surrounds your soul. The energy that you emit. The energy that drains others. The energy that inspires them. Your personal atmosphere. Your ambience.

It is your duty to dive into your potential

It is your purpose, your spiritual responsibility to reach into your potential. Yes, into your potential. You reach into your potential because it is inside you. Not outside. It’s an illusion to think that you will find your potential outside of you. Your soul is in you, not out of you.

So what is your potential? At first, reaching for your potential will mean doing things that you love to do and being things that you love to be. It’s all very nice and a lot of fun. This is entry-level spirituality. Once you’ve been living what you love for a while, the next step is to do and be what you don’t love. What you don’t like. Maybe even what you hate. Yes. Think about it. Makes doing what you love as a path to your potential seem a bit lame don’t you think? And it’s lame because you’re limiting your potential to manifest in one direction only.

Your comfort zone.

Doing and being what you don’t like pushes you beyond your comfort zone. It builds character. It teaches you how to be resilient. Reaching into your potential is not a luxury. It’s a necessity. It’s essential for the evolution of consciousness within the collective soul.

Doing what you hate as a path to your potential? Now that’s a challenge to strengthen your spirit. Are you ready for it? You’ll be doing it for humanity.

Have you got the guts to do what you don’t love? Another lecture in tough love

Do you have the guts to live a life with soul? It’s easy to follow your heart and do what you love. But do you have the guts to do what you don’t love?

Have you got the guts to be the bad cop? Have you got the guts to be unpopular? Have you got the guts to be invisible? Do you have the guts to do what others don’t or won’t or can’t? Day after day, week after week, and maybe even year after year?

Don’t fall into the trap of believing that if or when you have to do what you don’t love that you’ve been overcome by a dark night of the soul. No. You are not in a dark night. You’re not ready. You’re spiritual bypassing. You’re trapped in a cycle of perpetual positivity. Casting shadows instead of owning them.  Stop. Do you really think that a life with soul will let you live the high life for the rest of your life? No. A soulful life is a balanced life. While spiritual bypassing may be fine for zombies, a life without ups and downs signals death for those with a soul.

Are you busy casting shadows instead of owning them?

 

Does your life have soul? Will you dare to go where others dare not? It’s easier to keep bypassing. It’s safe. It’s secure. It’s expected. But it’s lopsided. And overbearing.